Random Babbling
by Lord Drash
Summary: A random and hilarious story involving Mario starring in a special show, so as to raise money.
1. Chapter 1

Random Babbling

A show created by some people of the Mushroom Kingdom in order to get some profit, as the princess continuously buys identical clothing.

Setting: A large hill, which for some reason is surrounded entirely by foldable chairs. In them were Toads and various Koopas. They appear to have come to watch some sort of show.

Narrator Guy: Once upon a time, many moons ago…there was a great hero!

Mario jumps in, with his yellow cape flapping in the non-existent breeze.

Narrator Guy: This great hero had unbelievable special powers! Fireballs…

Mario starts shooting fireballs at the Toads. Their heads catch on fire, and in between their panicked screaming they give a rather warm round of applause to Mario. Pun most definitely intended.

Narrator Guy: The ability to fly…

Mario takes a running start and then flies off into air. However his cape is poorly made so he comes crashing down in a bunch of Koopas. He quickly back flips to the center of the stage.

Narrator Guy: And really high jumping skills, which are rendered pointless by the fact he can fly.

Mario hops up and down.

Narrator Guy: But WHY is he a hero you ask?  
Several Toads and Koopas nod their heads.

Narrator Guy: Well, because he can save people! For example…Can a Toad come out of the audience? And a Koopa as well?  
A very excited Toad and Koopa Troopa come out of the audience and stand by Mario.

Narrator Guy: Excellent! Now Toad, look terrified and Koopa, beat him up.

Koopa: Don't you mean PRETEND to beat him up?

Narrator Guy: Doesn't matter to me.

Koopa: Okay.

The Koopa immediately starts actual pummeling. After a few minutes (to build dramatic tension) Mario jumps in the way of the Koopa.

Mario: OH NOOOOOOOO!  
Narrator Guy: Yes! Mario shall rescue this poor defenseless Toad!

Mario grabs the poor defenseless Toad and uses him as a club to beat off the Koopa. The Koopa quickly runs away, and Mario puts down the badly bruised and battered Toad, who gave Mario an adoring smile before passing out. Everyone applauded.

Narrator Guy: Yes! Now before you leave, you must sign us all your worldly possessions, so we can…uh…support the Mushroom Kingdom Economy…yeah…

The audience thinks for a moment and then decides to do it. After all, it's Mario!


	2. Chapter 2

Random Babbling

The show continues due to the immense popularity of the first episode. This time they decide to introduce Special Guest Stars!

The setting is still on the hill, although it looks nicer thanks to the immense amount of money they received from the last episode. The audience is mostly the same; however there are now some Goombas there as well. Mario stands heroically in the center of the hill. The voice of Narrator Guy booms, however not only is no one able to see him (At least…we thinks it's a him) but there seems to be no device nearby that can carry sound.

Narrator Guy: Thank you all for coming today! We'd like to start this show off with a bang, so could our Special Guest Star walk in please!  
A hatch opens up a little to the right, and out of it climbs a massive Goomba, with a crown and a mustache.

Narrator Guy: Yes, it's the Goomba King, also known as Goomboss, and Oversized Stepping Stool!  
All the Goombas in the audience cheered.

Goomboss: Uh…what was that last thing?  
Mario: It's-a me-a Mario!  
Everyone cheered again.

Narrator Guy: And as you already know its Mario! Now for this special episode we're going to do something really neat…our Special Guest Star is going to battle Mario!  
Goomba King: I am? I thought I was just going to answer some questions about my family and-

Narrator Guy: FIGHT!  
Mario: Okeydokey!

Mario charges at Oversized Stepping Stool and kicks his foot.

Goomboss: OW! Well fine, if we're going to fight…then take THIS!  
He shudders and three Goombas appear out of nowhere in front of him.

Narrator Guy: Oh my! How exciting!  
The Goombas charge for Mario. He grabs them and throws them at Goomba King. They hit.

Oversized Stepping Stool: OW!  
The audience squeals in excitement.

Goomboss: You know this isn't just for your benefit, I think Mario's actually trying to hurt me!  
Mario: Okeydokey!  
He pulls out his hammer.

Goomba King: AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

The Goomba King runs through the audience and their folding chairs, knocking several into the air. They fall down on other audience members, causing more injuries.

Narrator Guy: Uh…you're going to have to pay us for those injuries. We don't want people to think that watching Mario is painful, so pay us and don't tell anyone.

The audience members give a weak cheer, then hand Mario several bags of Coins.

Narrator Guy: Tune in next time for…something else. I make up the episode plots five minutes before it starts! YAY!


	3. Chapter 3

Random Babbling

Episode 3: The Ultimate Game Show!

We are on the same hill, surrounded by the same audience, although it appears to be slightly larger, as the show has been widely anticipated. Standing on a large pedestal Mario bounces up and down.

Narrator Guy: Yes! It's great to see you all here today; even Luigi is in the audience!  
Everyone in the audience looks at Luigi, who's in the front and trying to pretend that he isn't there.

Luigi: I hate this show.

Narrator Guy: Can't you feel the brotherly love?

The audience nods enthusiastically.

Narrator Guy: Alright, well for today's awesome gameshow thing, we need a volunteer from the audience! Who wants to volunteer?  
Nearly everyone jumps up and down, in excitement and desire to be picked. Nearly everyone. Guess who isn't.

Luigi: I hate this show.

Mario: Whee!  
Mario ignores all the volunteers and grabs his brother. He then pulls him up on the pedestal, with him.  
Luigi: I hate you.

Mario: Woohoo!  
Narrator Guy: Now the reward for the winner of this awesome gameshow is riches beyond your wildest dreams!  
Luigi perked up at this.

Luigi: Really? How wild?!  
Narrator Guy: Beyond what you're thinking right now! But you have to win!  
Luigi: I will!

Narrator Guy: Alright! Now the first question is for Mario…what is your name?  
Mario: It's-a me-a Mario!  
Narrator Guy: Correct!

Luigi was shocked.

Luigi: What kind of question was that?!  
Narrator Guy: A good one. Now shut up and answer this! What question were you questioned when you were questioned a question?

Luigi: I have no clue.

Narrator Guy: Oooh…you're wrong!  
Luigi: This game is rigged!  
Narrator Guy: Of course. Mario, your question. What is a vocal noise you use to express joy and/or happiness?  
Mario: Woohoo!  
Narrator Guy: Correct!  
Luigi: You're mean.

Narrator Guy: Duh. Now for you…how many Bare Bears could a Bare Bear Bear, if a Bare Bear could Bear Bare Bears?!

Luigi: What?!  
Narrator Guy: Ohhh…that's wrong… Mario wins the first round! Tune in next time to see what happens after this! Bye!  
Luigi: I hate you.

Mario: Okeydokey!


End file.
